Tomorrow is the big day.... I am so excited yet so nervous... My estrogen level is a little high.. Trying to see that as optimistic for lots of eggs would not be a surprise to have as few as 8 or as many as 18..
I am trying to relax and be positive and optimistic.. However I know that the most frustrating part of this is that there is no control.. God is in control and as much as I should find that comforting I begin to question if this is my plan not his.. I am being obedient and praying and asking but what if his answer is no.. What if when he formed the world his plan was for me to only have Drew.. I know I need to be thankful for my first miracle but I wish my head would communicate with my heart. Praying that if that is the answer that God will quite the longing and desperation I am feeling today.. I truly am crying to him from the depths of my heart to hear my prayer. Praying and dreaming that his answer is yes and this is the promise in my heart that God will hear and answer my prayer for another child.. Waiting for the completion of my family..
John is amazing and patient and kind.. I could not ask for anything more from my wonderful husband.. He has made this journey tolerable and even fun and humorous at times. He is what makes me realize that God does answer prayers he heard my prayer when I thought my life was over and I would never love or marry again ... He was with me when I was battered and bruised and crying out for answers.. My prayer today is that once again he will hear my prayer and the answer will be yes..
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first, i LOVE the wedding pictures! you look beautiful! it looked like a wonderful day! i'm so happy that you and john and drew are a family!
i am praying so hard for you! your post brought tears to my eyes. i want so much for God to give you this baby, or babies!!!!
rest, rest, rest and know that i am thinking of you often and praying for those follicles and for your soon to be embryos!!!
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